We hope these wise (or not-so-wise) morsels from famous names suit your palate.
- MY MOTHER-IN-LAW HAS COME TO OUR HOUSE SEVEN YEARS IN A ROW AT CHRITMAS TIME. THIS YEAR WE’RE GOING TO DO SOMETHING DIFFERENT. WE’RE GOING TO LET HER IN. (Les Dawson)
- ONCE AGAIN WE COME TO THE HOLIDAY SESON, A DEEPER RELIGIOUS TIME THAT EACH OF US OBSERVES IN HIS/HER OWN WAY BY GOING TO THE MALL OF OUR CHOICE. (Dave Barry)
- NOTHING SAYS HOLIDAYS LIKE A CHEESE LOG. (Ellen DeGeneres)
- MOST TEXANS THINK HANUKKAH IS SOME SORT OF DUCK CALL. (Richard Lewis)
- NEVER WORRY ABOUT THE SIZE OF YOUR CHRISTMAS TREE. IN THE EYES OF CHILDREN THEY ARE ALL 30 FEET TALL. ((Larry Wilde, comedian)
- LET’S ALL BE NAUGHTY AND SAVE SANTA THE TRIP. (Gary Allan, American musician)
- YOU CAN TELL A LOT ABOUT A PERSON BY THE WAY THEY HANDLE THREE THINGS: A RAINY DAY, LOST LUGGAGE AND TANGLED CHRISTMAS TREE LIGHTS. (Maya Angelou)
- CHRISTMAS IS A TIME WHEN EVERYBODY WANTS HIS/HER PAST FORGOTTEN AND PRESENTS REMEMBERED. (Phyllis Diller)
- THERE ARE MANY THINGS MONEY CAN’T BUY. AND NOT ONE OF THEM IS ON MY SON’S CHRISTMAS LIST. (Milton Berle)
- I ONCE BOUGHT MY KID A SET OF BATTERIES FOR CHRISTMAS WITH A NOTE THAT SAID “TOYS NOT INCLUDED”. (Bernard Manning, English comedian)
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